Leave The World A Little Better

LEAVE THE WORLD A BIT BETTER
by Ron White

Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote a poem on success. One of his measures of success in that poem was to, “Leave the world a bit better.” That line has always stuck in my head. Emerson said you have succeeded if you leave the world a bit better. I have made that line part of my life philosophy. When the tide goes out, there is a mark where the water was. When the waters of life recede from the shore of my being and my heart pumps for the last time, my desire is that there will be a mark where I stood. My aim is that the mark will say, “For some decades, a man occupied this space that saw others more important than himself and made an effort to leave the world a better place for them and those yet to come.”

Our society tells us that success is measured by bank accounts, power, beauty and wealth. These are often the result of hard work, luck or birth. They are not evil and I strive for some of them daily. However, they are not the marks by which I will measure the success of my life.

So how do you do it? How do you “leave the world a bit better?”

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- Give a percent of your income away to a charity or church. This makes your community better.
- Save a percentage of your income to pass down to your family when you leave.
- Volunteer your time for those who are less fortunate. Are you volunteering anywhere?
- Mentor someone who needs a positive direction in life.
- Follow and get involved in politics. Our laws and leaders will determine the future. You can have a hand in that future.

Or you can amass as much wealth as you can, spend it as fast as you can on the fading desires of your heart and seek to please yourself first. Our culture might tell you that this is success. Emerson tells us that it is not. I encourage you to realize that the waters of your life will eventually withdraw from the shore. When it does, will there be a watermark?

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Ron White is the nation's #1 Memory Expert and is one of the top in the world.

The Veteran

The Veteran ~ Author Unknown

He was getting old and paunchy
And his hair was falling fast,
And he sat around the Legion,
Telling stories of the past.

Of a war that he once fought in
And the deeds that he had done,
In his exploits with his buddies;
They were heroes, every one.

And 'tho sometimes to his neighbours
His tales became a joke,
All his buddies listened quietly
For they knew where of he spoke.

But we'll hear his tales no longer,
For ol' Bob has passed away,
And the world's a little poorer
For a Soldier died today.

He won't be mourned by many,
Just his children and his wife.
For he lived an ordinary,
Very quiet sort of life.

He held a job and raised a family,
Going quietly on his way;
And the world won't note his passing,
'Tho a Soldier died today.

When politicians leave this earth,
Their bodies lie in state,
While thousands note their passing,
And proclaim that they were great.

Papers tell of their life stories
From the time that they were young
But the passing of a Soldier
Goes unnoticed, and unsung.

Is the greatest contribution
To the welfare of our land,
Some jerk who breaks his promise
And cons his fellow man?

Or the ordinary fellow
Who in times of war and strife,
Goes off to serve his country
And offers up his life?

The politician's stipend
And the style in which he lives,
Are often disproportionate,
To the service that he gives.

While the ordinary Soldier,
Who offered up his all,
Is paid off with a medal
And perhaps a pension, small.

It's so easy to forget them,
For it is so many times
That our Bobs and Jims and Johnnys,
Went to battle, but we know,

It is not the politicians
With their compromise and ploys,
Who won for us the freedom
That our country now enjoys.

Should you find yourself in danger,
With your enemies at hand,
Would you really want some cop-out,
With his ever waffling stand?

Or would you want a Soldier--
His home, his country, his kin,
Just a common Soldier,
Who would fight until the end.

He was just a common Soldier,
And his ranks are growing thin,
But his presence should remind us
We may need his like again.

For when countries are in conflict,
We find the Soldier's part
Is to clean up all the troubles
That the politicians start.

If we cannot do him honor
While he's here to hear the praise,
Then at least let's give him homage
At the ending of his days.

Perhaps just a simple headline
In the paper that might say:
"OUR COUNTRY IS IN MOURNING,
A SOLDIER DIED TODAY."

Paulissa Update

Hi friends,

It's been a while since I've written so think it's time for an update:

I'm doing OK, walking every day and getting to the Y when my schedule allows. Swamped under finals prep (last day is on the 25th) so I have term paper editing, etc, gearing up for next quarter (starts March 11th) which will be Intro to Human svc, doing lots of footwork for the nonprofit and being involved in the community.

There have been upper level mgmt layoffs at work, none of which affect me too much but it's still a distraction. That's the news from my side of the fence.

St. Cecelia Floral Festival

All photos copyright Paulissa Kipp @ 2010

If you're as tired of winter as I am, come on a little virtual vacation with me.

Saint Cecelia is the patron saint of music. The Festival features interpretive works of art, music, and floral design with a different theme each year. This year marks the 25th annual festival.

What If I Don't Know My Spouse's Love Language?

Help! I Don't Know My Spouse's Love Language

Do you know your love language? Do you know the love language of your spouse? Many couples are sincere. They love each other, but they are not speaking the right love language. My research indicates that there are only five basic languages of love. 1. Words of Affirmation - using words to affirm your spouse. 2. Gifts - the gift is evidence that you were thinking about them. 3. Acts of Service - doing something for your spouse that you know they would like. 4. Quality Time- giving your spouse your undivided attention. 5.Physical Touch - holding hands, kissing, embracing, putting your hand on their shoulder; any touch so long as it is affirming. Out of these five, each of us has a primary love language. One of these speaks more deeply emotionally than the others. If you don't speak the primary love language of your spouse he/she may not feel loved, even when you are speaking the others. What does your spouse do or say that hurts you most deeply? The thing that hurts you most deeply is probably a clue to your love language. It may not be what they do or say, but rather what they fail to do or say. One wife said, "He never lifts a hand to help me around the house. He watches television while I do all the work. I don't understand how he could do that if he really loved me." Her love language is acts of service. In her mind, if you love someone, you do things to help them. For her, actions speak louder than words. However, for others, words may speak louder than actions. One husband said, "All she ever does is criticize me. I don't know why she married me. It's obvious she doesn't love me." For him if you love someone, you speak kindly to them. His love language is words of affirmation. That is why her critical words hurt him so deeply. If you want to discover your spouses' love language you might ask: What is it that I do or say, or fail to do or say that hurts you most deeply? Their answer will reveal their love language. What does your spouse most often request of you? What your spouse requests of you most often, is a clue to his/her love language. You may have interpreted their requests as nagging. In fact, they have been telling you what makes them feel loved. If your spouse is requesting that you take a walk after dinner, go with them on a picnic, cut the TV off and talk, or get a weekend away together, they are requesting quality time. That is his/her primary love language. The thing that makes them feel most loved is when they have your undivided attention. One wife said, "I feel neglected and unloved because seldom does he spend time with me. He gives me nice gifts on my birthday and wonders why I'm not excited about them. Gifts mean little when you don't feel loved." Her husband was sincere, but he was not speaking her love language. He later said, "if I had known that sitting on the couch talking with her was more important than gifts, I could have saved a lot of money." Discover the love language of your spouse if you want a growing marriage. How does your spouse most often express love to you. Observe their love expressions carefully. Is it Words of affirmation? Gifts? Acts of Service? Quality time? Or, Physical Touch? The way they express love to you is likely the way they wish you would express love to them. If he is often hugging and kissing you, his love language is probably physical touch. He wishes you would take initiative to hug and kiss him. If she is always cooking meals, washing and folding your clothes, cleaning up the bathroom after you leave, then her love language is probably acts of service. She wishes that you would help her with the work around the house. If you don't, then she feels unloved. For her, your taking out the garbage is more important than your hugs and kisses. One husband said, "If I had known that my taking out the garbage would make her feel loved and more responsive sexually, I would have been taking out the garbage years ago." Too bad it took him so many years to learn his wife's primary love language. What does your spouse complain about most often? What your spouse complains about reveals his/her love language. We usually interpret their complaints as negative criticism, but they are actually giving us valuable information. Complaints reveal the heart. If your spouse says, "We don't every spend time together. We're like two ships passing in the dark." They are telling you that quality time is their love language and their love tank is setting on empty. If your spouse says, "I don't think you would ever touch me if I didn't initiate it." They are revealing that physical touch is their love language. If you return from a business trip and your spouse says, "You mean you didn't bring me anything?" They are telling you that gifts is their love language and they can't believe that you came home empty-handed. If your spouse complains, "I don't ever do anything right." They are telling you that words of affirmation is their love language and they are not hearing those words from you. If they say, "If you loved me, then you would help me." They are shouting that their love language is acts of service. Discover and speak the love language of your spouse if you want a growing marriage.

Adapted from The 5 Love Languages™ The Secret to Love that Last by Dr. Gary Chapman

Step Back

"Step back!"
By Bob Perks

I love watching football. I'm just not
up on all the terms. I simply love the
idea of it. I love to see a pass thrown so
precisely that the receiver doesn't even
have to look until the last second, just
show up at the designated
spot and open their arms.

Oh, if life was that way!

In a sense it is.

Make a game plan.
Practice.
Follow through.
Be where you are supposed to be, when you
you are supposed to be.
Be receptive and flexible enough to adjust.
Be aware that others will be there, too, ready to
get what you want before you do or stop you from
scoring.
If you fail, try again.
Listen to "The Quarterback and Coach."
When all odds are against you, play like you're the best.
Even when others appear to be winning, play like you still
have a chance. You do.
Work as a team. When one scores, everyone does.

I love this one. In order to get ahead you have to step back.

The quarterback does it all the time. The ball is on the line
of scrimmage, but gets sent back in order to move ahead.

Yes, doing so sometimes causes loss of yardage, but
like in life, you'll never get ahead without stepping back to
see where you want to go.

If you want to get ahead, step back.

"I wish you enough!"

J

Bob Perks

I encourage you to share my stories but
I do ask that you keep my name and contact
information with my work.

P.O. Box 1702

Shavertown, Pa. 18708

Contact Bob 2believe@comcast.ne

If you would like to receive Bob's Inspirational
stories, please visit http://www.IWishYouEnough.com
and submit your email address.

"I Wish You enough!"
© 2001 Bob Perks

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear
much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough "Hello's" to get you through the final "Goodbye."

Enlarging Our Vision

This post really sums up the thoughts I have about advocating for those less fortunate. Please take the time to read it.

by Bob Perks

"You are the sum total of everything you believe and see in the world," I said.

I was speaking to a small group recently, sharing my thoughts and ideas for the new year. I went on to urge everyone to look for the opportunity to see life in the details.

"For having spent this time together today, we are now a little bit more than we were yesterday," I concluded. "You are now a part of me wherever I go."

As it happens after every talk I share, people come up to offer their kind words and general comments and ask a few questions. From experience, I know that some will be brief and some, well, they will dominate the little time I have until the next speaker takes the podium. I make every attempt to speak to each person waiting, even if I must take them out to the hallway in order to permit the meeting to go on.

Eye contact is key. I try to "see what they are saying." Keeping a promise I made to myself, I did speak with about a dozen people that day. I managed to speak with all the people in the line, but as I was gathering my notes, I heard someone say, "It's also what you didn't see."

I looked around and saw no one. Shrugging it off, I continued my effort to collect myself.

I picked up my belongings and turned quickly, nearly running into a man standing directly behind me.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were there, my friend," I said.

"I didn't mean to startle you," he said. "I heard your talk."

"Oh, thanks for being there."

"It's also what you didn't see," he said.

Not having any idea what that meant, I looked over my glasses and paused for a second before asking, "What didn't I see?"

"You said, ‘You are the sum total of everything you believe and see in the world,’" he explained, "but I believe it's more about what you don't see."

I asked him to explain. "It's easy to say that we need to see life in the details, but we must also learn what to look for."

He was right. "So you’re saying we are what we choose to see," I said.

"Yes, and your job is to help us learn what to look for," he added. He then shook my hand, placed his hand on my shoulder, smiled, and walked away.

I sat down and thought about what he said. I thought about the many things we don’t see:

It's easy to see the light, but we need to value the darkness, too. There we will find the lost and lonely who are always left behind.

Anyone can find a rose in a field of dandelions, praise its beauty, and bathe in its perfume, but who will see the value in what appears to be weeds?

We can celebrate the first one to cross the finish line, but who will see the magnificent effort of the one who finished last?

We can stand in awe of the master architects who built the Taj Mahal, but who is moved by the maintenance workers who clean it and make it shine daily?

We can climb to the top of a mountain and congratulate ourselves for having accomplished the feat. But who sees the miracle in the creation of both us and the mountain?

Yes, we are the sum total of all we believe, all we choose to see, and all we don't.

Maybe we are given just one day at a time to live but many chances to see it differently. The question to ask ourselves is, “What have I been missing?”