Forgiveness

A friend sent this to me a couple of years ago. I do not know the author. If you do, please let me know so that proper attribution can be provided.

The ability of humans to forgive each other never ceases to
amaze me. It's almost as amazing as the ability of humans
NOT to forgive each other. Even when they've been
irreparably harmed, irreversibly bereaved, some people
manage to dig deep and find forgiveness, while others who've
been barely scratched struggle to even say the word
"forgive."

Marriage counselor: "Star Jones, I know this is hard, but
can you please tell your husband, Al, that you forgive him
for finishing the pumpkin pie."

Star: "I forg ... I forg ... I forget you!"

Al: "Come on, Star. It was only a pie!"

Star: "It may have been only a pie to you, but to me, it was
breakfast. You didn't expect me to eat only the T-bone,
did you?"

Some folks hold grudges for an eternity. They'll go decades
without talking to a friend or family member, even someone
as close as a brother or sister. If they're lucky, they'll
eventually reconcile, just in time to share a condo at the
retirement village.

Eighty-year-old woman: "I forgive you, Harold. I really do.
I can't be mad at my brother forever."

Seventy-year-old man: "Oh, thank you Mildred. That's very
gracious of you. I really didn't mean to use your fruitcake
as a doorstop. It was an accident."

Woman: "Oh, that didn't really bother me, Harold. What
bothered me is when you started killing rats with it."

Man: "I'm so sorry, Mildred. I was just trying to give them
a snack. Do you think I was being cruel?"

Forgiveness often means looking at the big picture and
realizing that everyone makes mistakes. That's probably how
Hillary Clinton managed to forgive Bill. She took all his
good deeds into consideration and decided that the marriage
was worth saving, that he was truly sorry, that it wouldn't
be much trouble to staple his boxers to his undershirt.

It always helps when the offender apologizes or seems
remorseful. But even then, some offenses just seem
unforgivable. It still amazes me that Don King managed to
forgive his electrician. If he can do it, so can the rest of
us. That's why I've decided to do a little forgiving myself:

---I forgive Ben Affleck for the movie "Gigli."

---I forgive Madonna for all her movies.

---I forgive Elmo for stealing my wife's heart.

---I forgive Keanu Reeves for stealing my wife's
hairstyle.

---I forgive Janet Jackson for showing us her breast during
the Super Bowl. And I'm more than willing to forgive her
again.